Family workout 

I decided I was sick of not being able to do anything even remotely cardio whilst repairing myself, so, I did some! We went for a run with the pushchair and I managed about 3k very slowly and then switched it up to side steps, high knees, bum kicks, lunges (very carefully!) and then squats and press up with the little man joining in. We also did some stretching and sprint starts with him, very cute! 

The knees were sore and my Achilles was hitching about it all last night, but it was great fun. I had intended on doing it again this morning but I was a bit sore still so Tom went out with his mate for a 10k whilst Leo and I stayed home and did a bench workout, just upper body and abs. Let’s see how the elbows feel about that! 

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Meal replacements

I’ve been looking for a suitable vegan meal replacement since I returned to work. With going to the gym on my lunch breaks, I always felt it wasn’t acceptable to then sit and each lunch after my lunch hour, this is where the quest came from. 

We had been using Huel for some time and it’s brilliant. It’s totally nutritionally balanced, so in theory you can live solely on that. It taste great and always kept me full, unfortunately, their latest version of it bloats me terribly and gives me really awful pain. People do claim it passes, but I just couldn’t get used to it or take the debilitating affect of it when having to interact with Leo, so I’ve had to give up on it. 

I tried Garden of Life raw meal but I just couldn’t get used to to texture, it’s like drinking a muddy puddle.  That’s a no then. 

The next one I tried was Vega One. The sweetness makes your head hurt! It’s a lot more tolerable in water, but still, completely unnecessary but tolerable for me. However, still not completely happy I continued until I found Purition. 

Purition offer vegan and dairy based products. The whey is sourced from local, grass fed cows, so if you are interested purely in your own health rather than the full chain accountability, then this is a great option. I have tried both because the dairy version has more flavours, although the Vegan Chocolate is currently my favourite anyway. 

There is quite a lot of texture to it as the ingredients are raw, but it’s not gritty like the GOL. It’s more deliberate as it’s whole chia seeds and chunks of things like almonds (if it’s  that flavour!) and if you blend it then it’s almost smooth. There isn’t the intense sweetness of vega, this uses ground Stevia leaves so I don’t know if that makes a difference. The flavours are subtle and real and I think it may just be the one! Cost wise, you buy 3 bags at a time and it works out about £1.50 a meal. Perfect 

It has to get worse.. 

Before it gets better! At least that’s what I keep telling myself. I had my another physio session a couple of days ago and once again, I have suffered. This time he focused on strength exercises for my glutes mainly and some ankle /foot stabilisation. My glutes are basically lazier than a teenage boy and getting them working is a killer. My hips have complained incessantly ever since, it’s tendon disruption rather than muscular and I always find that’s worse. 

I not new to this game, so I know that there will be considerable disruption on the road to recovery, I just need to be realistic and acknowledge my pain though. Mark is great, he adapts things to work around my broken pieces. I think he is pretty amazed at just how shit my glutes are though. As long as I keep my focus and don’t rush things it’ll be a different story in 6 month’s time! 

I’m broken! 

I went to physio on Tuesday evening, to see what he would make of my sore heels and the ITB pain I have been experiencing. Basically, my ham strings and calves have turned to steel and my lack of core, glute and quad strength just means that my hams are ruling the world, and doing it badly! 

He used the modern day torture device that be has (mobilisation table) and really loosened me off and also acupunctured my Achilles on both sides. I now can’t walk! 

Either way, I have to stop doing anything other than core, quad and glute strengthening and stretching off of everything around there also. I feel I have an expensive few weeks of visits ahead but on the plus side, I might find the focus I have been searching for since coming back into it! 

I just can’t get going! 

It’s driving me mad, I just cannot find my flow with my exercise and weight loss this time. I was pretty good for most of the week and I did more cardio than I have for a long time, yet still I have put 2lbs on. I haven’t been amazingly strict, but I also haven’t had a 2lb gain week either. 

I am finding the whole thing really frustrating. I can’t dedicate enough time to the gym and I can’t dedicate enough time to meal prep, I can’t dedicate enough time to being a mum, I can’t dedicate enough time to studying, I can’t dedicate enough time to keeping a house: so instead I just bumble along achieving very little of fuck all, and it’s just no fun. I want to get cardio fitter but my bloody knee behaves like it’s being crushed by a vice after 2k, I want to get stronger but I don’t have time in my lunch break to do strength and cardio and I want to be better at yoga but my heels just constantly ache the second I suggest downward facing dog. 

I know that people all over instagram cram fitness, healthy eating, looking after a house and socialising around a having a child: but it is genuinely beyond me how they do it if they have a full time job with a one hour commute each way and want to spend any time with the family! 

I hate not having a good routine, I thrive off routine, but having a baby that switches sleep patterns more than the most fickle switch allegiances, means going to bed any later than 9.30 is a no go. Because there is so much pressure to not feed them to sleep, we stopped that, so now a 20 min bedtime is an hour and a half. So it’s quick tea then bed after that and it all starts again at 4.30 (because Leo thinks thats definitely the most ideal time to wake up) good job we listen to the ‘experts’ on shit like that! 

As you can probably tell from this, I’m irritated. I just want to feel good about myself again but don’t seem to be able to get there. My will power goes to shit when I’m tired and the fact that I haven’t gone without a broken night’s sleep in two years is really starting to take its toll on me. Isn’t it now people normally have another baby?!

That’s also another thing, I will get it all back in track and then decide I want another! If I’m not too old and broken that is. 

I hate writing negative posts, but the long and short of reality is that negativity can take a hold, no matter how hard you try. I don’t believe in wallowing, I believe in fixing things. I have some big changes I am in the process of making right now,  so hopefully they will prove to be the catalyst my motivation needs. 

We went, we conquered.. 

.. Sort of! 

My knees were screaming but the rest of it was fine, my body strength wasn’t nearly as pathetic as I expected it to be either! It was great to be out doing something like that together again, it’s been ages! 

My aim now though, is to get 5k fit and conditioned and get some body fat off me once and for all! I have a wedding in October, so I want to be back in shape for that: or at least in a shape I prefer to be! 

I haven’t seen the pics yet, Tom has and said there isn’t a single good one of us unfortunately. I will be the judge of that! 

Unprepared 

With two weeks to go until Tough Mudder, I think it is very safe to say that I am not even close to being ready. I had fully intended to keep up with eating well and training whilst being off work for two weeks. Being ill for the first week and then being completely demotivated for the second, as being away for a long weekend, have not helped in the slightest. In fact, I think all I have managed to achieve is about an 8lb weight gain. 

Thankfully it is the half mudder, but I’m still not prepped for that or even feeling up for the challenge. Being strict for the next two weeks is the best I can do, and attempting to not injure myself of course! I’m sure someone said this was meant to be fun!